“Logan” Movie Review

I grew up on a steady diet of Marvel comic books, toys, video games and Saturday morning cartoons.  It should come as no surprise then, I’ve always been a fan of Wolverine.

Today I caught a matinee showing of “Logan” and was blown away.

To me, the hallmark of a great performance is not being able to imagine anyone else playing the part, and Hugh Jackman’s portrayal of the titular character is nothing short of perfection.  I can neither imagine nor would I have any interest in seeing anyone else in the role.

I don’t go to the theater as often as I used to, but I’ve seen almost every X-Men movie on the big screen:  The good (“X-Men,” “X2: X-Men United,” “X-Men: Days of Future Past”), the bad (“X-Men: First Class,” “X-Men: Apocalypse”) and the ugly (“X-Men Origins: Wolverine”).

Speaking of “X-Men Origins: Wolverine,” when I first discovered they were making a Wolverine spinoff film I was excited, but less so once I found out it was an origin story.  In my view, they’d already done a stellar job of detailing enough of his backstory in “X2: X-Men United” to further develop the character, but omitted enough to preserve his enigmatic past.

In seeing that film, I thought it started off great, but it was clear too much executive meddling ruined it.  Fox seemed more interested in setting up unnecessary characters for spinoff films than in doing Wolverine’s story justice.

The second solo film, “The Wolverine” was a marked improvement over the first and found Logan battling his foes in Japan.

“Logan” was a completely different animal, no pun intended.  It was dark.  Depressing.  The film was incredibly well done, with equal parts action and heartbreak.  As the credits rolled, I felt a piece of my childhood had died, in the form of an old friend, a character I’ve known and loved since I was a kid.  I left the theater feeling sad and a little empty.

I’ll miss seeing Jackman’s Wolverine on the big screen, but respect his decision to walk away from the franchise and always leave us wanting more.

For those of you who haven’t seen it, I definitely recommend watching it, although I’ll admit I don’t know if I could watch it again.

Joe Bob Briggs & “MonsterVision”

Who else besides me remembers “MonsterVision”?

For those of you not in the know, “MonsterVision” was a TV show on the TNT network that ran from early 1991 to late 2000.  It primarily featured horror, sci-fi and fantasy films although occasionally other genres would slip in as well.  During its run, it was originally hosted by a Claymation-style moon character, and later by magicians Penn and Teller before finally receiving its permanent host, the legendary Joe Bob Briggs.

Joe Bob Briggs is the pseudonym of syndicated film critic, writer and comic performer John Irving Bloom.  Bloom was born in Dallas, Texas but was raised in Little Rock, Arkansas.  He attended Vanderbuilt University on a sports-writing scholarship and later began his writing career at Texas Monthly and the Dallas Times Herald.  While at the Herald, Bloom created the comedic persona of “Joe Bob Briggs” to review b-movies and other cult films.

The Briggs character is, essentially, a humorous, unapologetic Texas redneck with an undying love for drive-in theaters.  Originally, his reviews were reserved only for movies showing at the local drive-in, but later he began reviewing films available on VHS and DVD.

In the early 80s, Bloom lived in New York City where he encouraged film fans to engage in a “Postcard Fu” campaign in opposition to the city’s plans to renovate and redevelop 42nd Street, which would inevitably lead to the closure of many of the Big Apple’s ’round the clock grindhouse theaters.

In 1985, Bloom debuted his one-man show, “An Evening with Joe Bob Briggs” (later retitled “Joe Bob Dead in Concert”) in Cleveland.  After its success, Bloom took the show on the road and performed in more than fifty venues over the next two years.

It was the stage show that led to Bloom being invited to guest host “Drive-In Theater,” a late night show featuring b-movies on The Movie Channel (TMC).  Briggs was such a hit, he was later signed to a long-term contract.  The show (now retitled “Joe Bob’s Drive-In Theater”) became the highest rated show on the network and ran for nearly a decade.

“Joe Bob’s Drive-In Theater” ended after TMC decided to change its format in early 1996.  Bloom wasn’t without a gig for long, however, as he joined TNT as the new host of “MonsterVision” just four months later.

“MonsterVision” typically aired two movies a night, with the better known title usually receiving top billing.  The second movie was billed as “Joe Bob’s Last Call.”  Briggs host segments typically took place both in and outside his trailer and featured his usual comedic commentary including his trademark “Drive-In Totals,” a humorous list of a movie’s highlights, as well as other trivia about the film.

Unfortunately, “MonsterVision” was canceled in July 2000 with its final episode airing in September of that same year.  Gone but certainly not forgotten, “MonsterVision” will always hold a special place in my heart.  I still hold out hope we haven’t seen the last of Joe Bob hosting all-night monster movie marathons.

As the man himself has said, “The drive-in will never die.”

 

 

 

President Trump’s Red Pill Marriage Advice

Twitter user Portfolio Playboy (@Galanteador1189) tweeted:

Trump does this often.  Would b interesting to hear u gentleman’s view

“The person I hired to be my personal representative overseeing the construction, Barbara Res, was the first woman ever put in charge of a skyscraper in New York. She was thirty-three at the time, she’d worked for HRH, and I’d met her on the Commodore job, where she’d worked as a mechanical superintendent. I’d watched her in construction meetings, and what I liked was that she took no guff from anyone She was half the size of most of these bruising guys, but she wasn’t afraid to tell them off when she had to, and she knew how to get things done.

It’s funny. My own mother was a housewife all her life. And yet it’s turned out that I’ve hired a lot of women for top jobs, and they’ve been among my best people. Often, in fact, they are far more effective than the men around them.

– Donald J. Trump, “Trump: The Art of the Deal”

Illimitable Man (@IllimitableMan) with what I found to be an interesting response:

He hires high energy high testosterone women with little person syndrome’s need to prove itself. Great employees, but not wife material.

This, in turn, reminded me of something Trump himself had said, so I (@MrLeoneVolpe) decided to chime-in with:

Trump has also said he will not involve future wives in his business like he did Ivana, as he now considers it a mistake to do so.

I then added an image containing the following Trump quote:

“My big mistake with Ivana was taking her out of the role of wife and allowing her to run one of my casinos in Atlantic City, then the Plaza Hotel. The problem was, work was all she wanted to talk about. When I got home at night, rather than talking about the softer subjects of life, she wanted to tell me how well the Plaza was doing, or what a great day the casino had, I really appreciated all her efforts, but it was just too much…I will never again give a wife responsibility within my business. Ivana worked very hard, and I appreciated the effort, but I soon began to realize that I was married to a businessperson rather than a wife.”

– Donald J. Trump

I remembered the quote but not verbatim, so whilst looking for it online I stumbled across a link (which I found to be hilarious) from none other than Huffington Post.  Its title?

17 Of The Most Absurd Things Donald Trump Has Said About Marriage

Before I share the content of that post, let me just say I don’t pretend I have all life’s answers but I do believe I’ve stumbled upon two maxims which, if adhered to, will produce positive results in one’s life:

  • The opposite of whatever leftists say/do is the truth

If you’re ever unsure of what to think about a topic, simply find out what the left’s position is on it, turn that 180 degrees and you’ll be a whole hell of a lot closer to finding out what’s true.

  • Heed advice espoused by President Donald J. Trump

I find Donald Trump to be endlessly fascinating.  “The 48 Laws of Power” could be re-written citing only recent examples of things Trump has said and done.  Additionally, and perhaps unexpectedly, he may very well be one of the greatest sources of red pill marriage advice.  This, of course, makes it all the more ironic yet unsurprising a publication like Huffington Post would consider his remarks, “absurd.”

Without any further ado, I present red pill marriage advice courtesy of the God Emperor himself:

17 Of The Most Absurd Things Donald Trump Has Said About Marriage

Thrice-married Donald Trump may not be the best person to dole out marital advice — or any advice, for that matter — but that hasn’t stopped him from giving it through the years.

The Republican presidential candidate and “traditional marriage” advocate has been married to third wife Melania Knauss since 2005. His first marriage to Ivana Zelnickova lasted from 1977 to 1992, reportedly ending in a $25 million settlement for Ivana. He was married to second wife Marla Maples from 1993 to 1999.

Below, some of the most questionable things Trump has ever said about marriage in his books and in interviews.

1. If she won’t sign a prenup, she’s not the wife for you.

“The most difficult aspect of the prenuptial agreement is informing your future wife (or husband): I love you very much, but just in case things don’t work out, this is what you will get in the divorce. There are basically three types of women and reactions. One is the good woman who very much loves her future husband, solely for himself, but refuses to sign the agreement on principle. I fully understand this, but the man should take a pass anyway and find someone else. The other is the calculating woman who refuses to sign the prenuptial agreement because she is expecting to take advantage of the poor, unsuspecting sucker she’s got in her grasp. There is also the woman who will openly and quickly sign a prenuptial agreement in order to make a quick hit and take the money given to her.” (Trump: The Art of the Comeback, with Kate Bohner, 1997)

2. Don’t ever marry a “ballbreaker.”

“If he doesn’t lose the ballbreaker, his career will go nowhere.” (Trump: The Art of the Comeback)

3. Stay clear of women who “gripe” and “bitch.”

“Often, I will tell friends whose wives are constantly nagging them about this or that that they’re better off leaving and cutting their losses. I’m not a great believer in always trying to work things out, because it just doesn’t happen that way. For a man to be successful he needs support at home, just like my father had from my mother, not someone who is always griping and bitching. When a man has to endure a woman who is not supportive and complains constantly about his not being home enough or not being attentive enough, he will not be very successful unless he is able to cut the cord.” (Trump: The Art of the Comeback)

4. To avoid disagreements, simply tell your wife what to do.

“There’s not a lot of disagreement because, ultimately, Ivana does exactly as I tell her to do.” (on “The Oprah Winfrey Show” in April 1988)

5. Don’t make the mistake of giving your wife business responsibilities.

“My big mistake with Ivana was taking her out of the role of wife and allowing her to run one of my casinos in Atlantic City, then the Plaza Hotel. The problem was, work was all she wanted to talk about. When I got home at night, rather than talking about the softer subjects of life, she wanted to tell me how well the Plaza was doing, or what a great day the casino had. I really appreciated all her efforts, but it was just too much … I will never again give a wife responsibility within my business. Ivana worked very hard, and I appreciated the effort, but I soon began to realize that I was married to a businessperson rather than a wife.” (Trump: The Art of the Comeback)

6. Seriously, do you want a wife or an executive?

“There was a great softness to Ivana, and she still has that softness, but during this period of time, she became an executive, not a wife… You know, I don’t want to sound too much like a chauvinist, but when I come home and dinner’s not ready, I’ll go through the roof, okay?” (as quoted in TrumpNation by Timothy L. O’Brien, 2005)

7. But if you do employ her, give her a fair wage.

“My wife, Ivana, is a brilliant manager. I will pay her one dollar a year and all the dresses she can buy!” (as quoted in Vanity Fair, September 1990)

8. Don’t give your wife “negotiable assets.” That’s a yuuuuge mistake.

“I would never buy Ivana any decent jewels or pictures. Why give her negotiable assets?” (as quoted in Vanity Fair, September 1990)

9. Take a lax approach to fatherhood.

“Cause I like kids. I mean, I won’t do anything to take care of them. I’ll supply funds and she’ll take care of the kids. It’s not like I’m gonna be walking the kids down Central Park.” (in an interview with radio host Howard Stern in 2005)

10. And never touch a diaper.

“No, I don’t do that. There are a lot of women out there that demand that the husband act like the wife, and you know, there’s a lot of husbands that listen to that. So you know, they go for it.” (on the Opie and Anthony show in November 2005)

11. Keep your “experiences” with married women on the down-low.

“If I told the real stories of my experiences with women, often seemingly very happily married and important women, this book would be a guaranteed best-seller (which it will be anyway!). I’d love to tell all, using names and places, but I just don’t think it’s right.” (Trump: The Art of the Comeback)

12. Cherish it when you find someone with both beauty and brains — it’s highly uncommon.

“I knew from the start that Ivana was different from just about all of the other women I’d been spending time with. Good looks had been my top — and sometimes, to be honest, my only — priority in my man-about-town days. Ivana was gorgeous, but she was also ambitious and intelligent. When I introduced her to friends and associates, I said, ‘Believe me. This one’s different.’ Everyone knew what I meant, and I think everyone sensed that I found the combination of beauty and brains almost unbelievable. I suppose I was a little naive, and perhaps, like a lot of men, I had been taught by Hollywood that one woman couldn’t have both.” (Trump: Surviving at the Top, with Charles Leerhsen, 1990)

13. Consider an open marriage.

“I even thought, briefly, about approaching Ivana with the idea of an ‘open marriage.’ But I realized there was something hypocritical and tawdry about such an arrangement that neither of us could live with — especially Ivana. She’s too much of a lady.” (Trump: Surviving at the Top)

14. After leaving a marriage “for a piece of ass,” know that you’re bound to be cast as the bad guy.

“When a man leaves a woman, especially when it was perceived that he has left for a piece of ass—a good one!—there are 50 percent of the population who will love the woman who was left.” (as quoted in Vanity Fair, September 1990)

15. Don’t let your wife persuade you into accepting a work-life balance.

“Marla was always wanting me to spend more time with her. ‘Why can’t you be home at five o’clock like other husbands?’ she would ask. Sometimes, when I was in the wrong mood, I would give a very materialistic answer. ‘Look, I like working. You don’t mind traveling around in beautiful helicopters and airplanes, and you don’t mind living at the top of Trump Tower, or at Mar-a-Lago, or traveling to the best hotels, or shopping in the best stores and never having to worry about money, do you? If you want me to be home at five o’clock, maybe these other things wouldn’t happen and you’d be complaining about that, too. Why would you want to take something that I enjoy and change it?’ I always viewed her whys as being very selfish. But the fact is, in a marriage both sides have to be happy.” (Trump: The Art of the Comeback)

16. To keep the romance alive, don’t fart or “make a doody.”

“I’ve never see any, it’s amazing. Maybe they save that for after marriage.” (Trump in 2004, when Howard Stern asked if then-girlfriend Melania Knauss ever “makes a doody.” )

17. Acknowledge your spouse’s advice — then ignore it.

“I can tell you, [Melania]’s told me a couple of times during the debates she was very happy with my performances — if you can call it a performance — but she’s said you could tone it down a bit on occasion, which I understand.” (in an interview with ABC’s Barbara Walters in November 2015)

And there you have it, some of the best red pill advice on marriage you’ll ever get courtesy of our 45th President by way of Huffington Post, one of the shittiest #fakenews sources of all-time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why Jon Stewart is a Chicken Shit

Here’s something that’s always pissed me off about Jon Stewart — and why I consider him to be a chicken shit.  When he was host of “The Daily Show,” he’d frequently call out others’ actions, but if anyone tried calling him out, he’d hide behind the fact his show was a “comedy.”

To see him “in action” doing this, I’ve provided the following clip:

Essentially, the political-comedy genre allows a comedian to:

  • Use their celebrity as a platform to get public attention
  • Dip their toe in political waters by calling out actions of politicians/pundits, etc.
  • If ever they find themselves on the receiving end of criticism, cop out behind “it’s just a joke.”

If a comedian makes a statement, is it their real opinion or part of their “shtick”?  This provides them a certain amount of cover —  If a comment is well received, they can own it as their own belief.  If not, they can claim it merely a “comedic misfire.”

Politicians clearly aren’t afforded this same luxury.  Before Trump (B.T.), if a politician made an off-color remark or a joke that fell flat, it very likely could have cost them their political race, or possibly even their career.

The problem is, a comedian can “hit” a politician, but a politician can’t hit them back.  Why?  Because “it’s just a joke” when a comedian does it, but it’s considered “mean-spirited” if a politician responds in kind.  Comedians clearly have no problem with such hypocrisy, as Bill Maher frequently pulls this same kind of dodgy bullshit.

Comics are instigators who use a defense mechanism similar to “You wouldn’t hit a guy in glasses, would you?” when challenged.  This is what needs to happen to them when they try and pull that shit:

It’s interesting to note that when the shoe’s on the other foot, Stewart isn’t so good at taking a joke at his own expense.  Here’s a clip of Seth MacFarlane on Piers Morgan’s show talking about an experience he had after parodying Stewart on “Family Guy.”:

Hey Stewart, don’t dish it out if you can’t take it, pal.